Tips to Good Conversation
By Dessy Barnaby
Conversation is part of our every day life and one of the biggest keys to showing your confidence is in through conversation.
Establishing good conversation is no easy task, if you ever find yourself having to run away from a conversation or stuck in the middle of an important conversation without knowing what to say. These few guidelines will help you in sustaining a good conversation.
1. Be genuine.
In establishing any good conversation, be you the sender or the receiver, it’s important for us to be genuinely interested in the conversation that we are involved in.
Be it a conversation that you start out of need or courtesy, you have to actually want to talk to them. Conversation is a two way street where both parties should want or need to talk to each other, otherwise do not start a conversation to begin with.
2. Create and know the comfort zone.
Ruling out any angry or irate situation as the base of the conversation, it is good to always appear friendly in a conversation. Both parties have to be comfortable with the topic and if you are the one who is initiating the conversation, making sure the topic is not something beyond their comfort zone is very important.
Topics such as sexism, religion or politics are often categorized as sensitive so it’s important for the sender to find out the other party’s topic comfort zone than assuming otherwise. In a good conversation, it is equally important for both parties to feel comfortable to establish good communication flow.
3. Be a good listener.
Another important key element in a conversation is to be a good listener; it helps the flow if you are genuinely paying attention to the other party’s conversation.
Good conversation requires you to understand the flow completely and that comes with good listening. Pay attention to what the other person is saying because it will be insulting if you are dumb founded asking the questions to the answers they have already mentioned.
So unless you are prepared to listen to them, do not attempt to start the conversation to begin with! Because failing to listen will disrupt the communication flow.
4. Allow them to think and speak.
This is the part where you stop talking and actually do the listening. It’s true in conversation you have to listen, and in order for that to happen the other person has to be saying something and they can’t do it if you are talking. So usually after stating a few points in a conversation, you are required to pause and wait for their response.
The other person requires thinking and processing time, so allow them to take a few moments to actually digest the topic. Often than not most of us are not comfortable with any silence in a conversation. A wise communicator has to be able to feel comfortable during any silence during a conversation.
In any scenario, do not make them become uncomfortable and awkward by becoming impatient and repeating yourself. Give some space to the other party and do not continue the conversation until
you get some good indication that they are listening or understanding the topic of the conversation.
Understanding the fundamental keys to a good conversation not only will make you a better communicator, but it will also aid you in many aspects during a conversation to always keep the communication effective.